Ahh, sigh. Okay.
I have this scheduled to post tomorrow. This is past me writing to future you guys.
I usually try to make my posts ahead of time so they’re up and ready to go when post day comes around.
I’m hanging on.
I’m not really tired, but my mind is feeling hazy. Everything’s kinda distorted right now, but I’m pushing through.
I’m still here, even on days like these.
And that shit’s tough, man.
In and out of my head, feeling like everything’s building up inside me. Like I’m just ready to explode from all these thoughts and feelings I’ve been carrying.
But really, I’m okay. I think.
I haven’t taken my medication, and yeah, there’s a lot you guys don’t know.
But even with the medication, I still feel like this.
That’s why sometimes I just stop taking them. For one, it feels like a chore, and I don’t usually have the energy to keep up with taking them.
And when I do take them, sometimes I still feel the same.
I’ve been putting in the work, though.
Therapy, content creating, blogs, music, my dog, cleaning. So much.
Like, I know what I’m taking and the effects they’re supposed to have on me, but sometimes it feels like there’s no effect at all.
Maybe I feel a little more uplifted and not so down, but there’s still a lot to feel.
And when I’m locked in, my mind is just in it.
Yeah, I think I’m just gonna take the rest of the night easy.
Little by little.
Hope you guys are good.
Take care, really.
Peace. 🐼🖤
— Chris / Luvlyboy
